humour, Life

Notes from a small dog – the poltergeist


Mea culpa and all that. I’m in the doghouse again.

You see before you a very sorry dog.

Mainly, I admit, because I didn’t get to finish the cheese before she came back downstairs…

The pâté was nice though…

She may not have been best pleased with me. But, in my defence, I was only trying to help.

The fridge didn’t seem to be securely closed, you see. Now, anything could have got in there… spiders… flies… even next door’s cat! And I’m supposed to guard stuff. Well, I couldn’t leave it open…

But before I closed it, I thought I should just check why it hadn’t closed. Or if the cat was already in there. And if everything was still safe…

So I just nudged it open a bit. No cats. Phew.

I was just going to close it and go curl up for a bit, when everything threw itself  off the shelves. Honest! The fridge is haunted!

ani orb

‘Course, I couldn’t call the Ghostbusters, ’cause she won’t let me use the phone. And she’s a bit sceptical about poltergeists… you two-legses don’t see the things we see… so I knew she’d blame me for the mess.

So I thought I should clean up.

‘Course, I could have just put everything back and closed the door, but I know she’s a bit funny about eating stuff off the floor. Weird… it doesn’t bother me at all…

And I know she hates to see food wasted…

So, there was only one thing for it. I’d have to eat it.

In a spirit of pure self-sacrifice, you understand.

She’d never know.

Except, she came down… with the camera…


I’m not sure quite how she took it… she was howling with tears streaming down her face. I didn’t know she liked pâté that much.

But her soft bits were wobbling, like when she laughs… so it was hard to tell.

She did eventually call me a bad girl… but she let me keep the pâté anyway…

ani orbs

There’s just no understanding you two-legs.

Honest, you won’t believe in polterbeasties, but you believe two-legses are logical, rational creatures.

Like I said, you don’t see what we see. And I don’t just mean the weird stuff.

Wonder if she’ll let me have dinner after all the pâté? She has it for starters, so I don’t see why not…stats 029

I’ll go ask. Might be time for the old head-on-knee trick…

If not, I can always help myself… 😉

Much love,

Ani xxx


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